Saturday, November 8, 2014

Beth Mason's stark retelling of killer possum confirmed!

Second ward councilwoman's announcement of possum terror felt in uptown Hoboken

The streets are empty. A spectre has descended over the land, at least on uptown Hoboken where few people walk the streets especially at night when the nocturnal terror is most likely to emerge. There's real fear here. Stroller moms don't venture out even with "big dogs" as Beth Mason would advise they too face much peril and are likely to fall prey to the danger in our midst.

A spectre is haunting Hoboken. The spectre of possum.

Don't be fooled by the disguise. This possum
is more dangerous than the killer rabbit seen below and
has a really foul temperament.

The police are helpless, overwhelmed as residents have swamped the phone lines besieged by monster raccoons rumored to be laying waste to all of midtown.

A larger fear looms as the whole town cowers in terror. One rumor is going around like wildfire in the Hoboken Housing Authority. Residents desperate for money beyond Vote by Mail "campaign work" want to see corruption take back all of the Mile Square City with King Rat Carmelo as mayor. Their Tenant Association is ready to get behind Team Mason's rodents. Well as soon as Beth Mason's street money with the pizza arrives.

There's a larger prevailing concern among law enforcement. What if the marsupials freshly allied with the procyonid family team up with the rodents, say the totality of political rats aligned with Beth Mason? Could Hoboken be facing a disaster of epic proportions and ensuing martial law?

While Mile Square residents hide in their homes from the monster raccoons and ill tempered killer possum, is a secret meeting taking place at 12th and Washington between the marsupials and rodents?

Hoboken residents are raising their voices asking for State intervention as their dogs and cats refuse to venture outside the door due to killer possum concerns.

Hoboken pets won't step outside on a stoop as Beth Mason's fears of
killer possum has spread since Wednesday night.

Gov. Chris Christie this morning said a state of emergency exists in Hoboken and the National Guard is ready to descend on the Mile Square should the rodents, led by Beth Mason's rats are joined by flying squirrels on suicide missions attacking the heads of residents.

Is Beth Mason's dastardly plot to take over Hoboken finally at hand?

Mason's head political operative who manages the duties of Hoboken second ward council in Weehawken and at the uptown office of the Hudson Distorter was unavailable to provide a statement on her behalf.

In her defense, Beth Mason's allegations of monster raccoons and killer possum are historically supported by the mean spirited killer rabbit seen here in the video below.

                                


Talking Ed Note: This story should be satire but it's closer to reality thanks to the madness of Beth Mason. Inspired by yesterday's limericks courtesy of Reforumus Gianticus in the comments at the link here.