It's come to my attention that some of you may be hearing something about emails, tens of thousands here and tens of thousands there. First, it's important you know I didn't authorize or release any emails for you to read in the Blojobaye litigation. You should not read any of these emails nor speak of them in my presence or to anyone in Hobroken. Anyone who does I assure you, there will be hell to pay. And I should know, that's my residence in waiting after I depart the mausoleum on the hill.
So too, there may be a few emails or 60,000 rumored to have been obtained in an effort at transparency in the hospital sale. Once again, I can assure you any alleged illicit activity in obtaining these rumored emails was not authorized by me. This was more likely well intentioned efforts by my good friends at the Hobroken Reporter to show the truth about the evil Zimmerists. They are always fighting to bring you all the news that we deem fit for you to read.
It's possible you may have heard about a Hobroken Reporter business partner who is distantly connected to me and claimed to obtain these rumored 60,000 emails. This is a pure fiction made up by a misguided lowly temporary employee who is not a paid political operative affiliated with me, my civic charity or shell companies. As I've testified in Hoodsin Superior Court, I don't pay any of these political operatives to do any of these civic activities. Sometimes people are a little overeager and do my stuff without my expressed authorization. On occasion, I call them friends just to help their self-esteem. Sometimes a thug or punk gets a little help from my many shell companies. That's all handled by my professionals who run them on a day to day basis. I have no role in any of those decisions and unless there's proof, I'm going to say I don't have anything to do with it.
Some may have accidentally read unauthorized emails discussing political operations on my behalf. You should know that these are merely volunteers who support me in making Hobroken better. Volunteers can make a mistake now and then but we as One Hobroken community must unite behind efforts on behalf of Hobroken as it continues to suffer under a vast Zimmerist conspiracy.
Now some of my volunteers may have strayed slightly but none of them will be joining up with all those unpaid Zimmerists. Who pays any of those volunteer Zimmerists and all these Hobroken boards? No one that's who!
What's important is that you know I will be hiring more professionals who will be making staffing changes to improve my efforts for all Hobroken.
Together we will destroy this Zimmerist conspiracy among us once and for all. In the interim, &%#@ all you Zimmerists, I hope you all drop dead!
Looking down benevolently upon you all,