Saturday, April 1, 2017

Mayor Zimmer: No third term, 'I must stand aside for the sake of diversity'

Shocking decision will see Councilman Mike DeFusco handed baton becoming Hoboken mayor

MSV is exclusively reporting Mayor Dawn Zimmer who sought a third term as mayor will be stepping down and not seek re-election after all. The surprising turnaround coincides with the rise of Councilman Mike DeFusco who the mayor endorsed for the City Council on her 2015 council ticket.

The real reason for Zimmer’s change of heart is reportedly due to an agreement reached with her once expected electoral challenger, Mike DeFusco. A hastily scheduled news conference will see both jointly announce the passing of the baton from Zimmer to DeFusco in a news conference with the theme “Diversity is Our Strength.” The mayor has held her current office for almost eight years.

Councilman Mike DeFusco, de facto winner of the diversity mayoral sweepstakes.
A Diversity Dossier pinned questionable burka activities on Mayor Zimmer forcing her to endorse him for her job.

Reports of a Mayor Zimmer resignation were first reported by the Hudson Reporter almost three years ago. The reasons for Mayor Zimmer not seeking a third term are however radically different than those put forward there. Al Sullivan in his weekly political column cited anonymous Old Guard sources claiming an arrest by the FBI imminent.

To the dismay of Zimmer insiders, the two term mayor capitulated to Team DeFusco’s demands she step aside and endorse DeFusco as a diversity “Pride” mayoral candidate. Councilman DeFusco recently hosted a LGBT event in Hoboken and was expected to see a big endorsement from the NJ group.  

The backdrop to Zimmer’s sudden and shocking tumble will be deemed genius by media  and close political observers covering Team DeFusco and may lead to implications for Progressive candidates seeking elected office in the state. One political observer marveled, "It was a masterstroke. This kid is smart and a quick study. He stole this right out of the Donald Trump playbook. Draw your opponent in and then come right over the top slamming them with a winning hand."

For several months a “Diversity Dossier” against Mayor Zimmer had been circulating among local Mile Square media. It highlights salacious details in a 200,000 page report of a trip Zimmer secretly took to Saudi Arabia last year where she was seen cavorting around Riyadh in a burka. While some insiders claimed it was for a documentary on diversity geared for her re-election campaign, others say it was a full-blown joint Al Qaeda-ISIS operation sponsored to infiltrate the US and install gullible officials into the Muslim Brotherhood. A burka wearing American mayor is seen as quite a coup.

Jordanian intelligence officials say Mayor Zimmer was surveilled and overheard well aware of a plot by Councilman Mike DeFusco to diversity her out of office. She was going to beat him at his own political game becoming the first Jewish Muslim burka-wearing mayor in America.

Mayor Dawn Zimmer captured in this 2016 photo in Riyadh, Saudi Arabia. A plan to go toe to toe with Councilman Mike DeFusco to see who is more pro-diversity has degenerated into scandal seeing her decline seeking a third term.
Photo courtesy Jordanian Intelligence.

But the plan to out-diversity DeFusco would soon take a calamitous turn.  Surveillance videos taken by Jordanian intelligence saw Zimmer in parking lots of buildings where she’d lie in wait if any Saudi women attempted to get into a driver’s seat without a male family member escort.

“She was a bit overzealous,” one Jordanian intel source said. “We have her literally threatening to drop a dime on two Saudi women who were only trying to remove items from a car trunk. She really took to Sharia Law in a hurry. It was almost like she was reprogrammed for it."

Things deteriorated further when Zimmer in full burka was seen grabbing car keys and throwing them into the dessert yelling “Aloha Snackbar!” demanding energy drinks not to turn the women into the Saudi religious police. The Kingdom's religious police patrol the streets enforcing dress codes, gender separation and prayer times under Sharia law.

Jordanian sources confirmed the Diversity Dossier was underwritten by Hoboken resident Beth Mason. The former councilwoman with her coterie of paid political operatives bankrolled anti-Reform candidates and civil litigation against alleged “Zimmerists” in Hoboken for years.  Jordanian intelligence reportedly received a ransom type payment in line with what Iran received for American hostages to put together the Zimmer dossier.  

Councilman Mike DeFusco is expected to announce at the press conference that his first official act as mayor will be to order by executive fiat all Hoboken businesses remove any gender markings on restrooms. “Bathrooms are a universal human right and no one can define how one feels about any self-designated choice among dozens of gender options. I’m hereby announcing Hoboken bathrooms are open for business,” the anticipated mayor will say.

One Team DeFusco advisor was gleeful over the mayor’s sudden capitulation. “This plan went far better than we even imagined. The Diversity Dossier deflated Zimmer and her team to the point they were ready to throw someone off the roof at City Hall. When she read the Diversity Dossier’s contents she just threw in the towel.”

Mayor Dawn Zimmer after surrendering office may join a New Hampshire investigation into Russian Salad Dressing connecting President Donald Trump to Russia.

It’s unclear what Mayor Zimmer will do in the future but she’s mulling options. One would see her return to her home state of New Hampshire where Russian salad dressing was created and join an investigation into that dressing's Trump connection to Russia. The creator of Russian salad dressing knows a guy who knows a guy who once rode a bus with Vladimir Putin in East Germany and reportedly attended a Trump rally. "It’s a bonafide Russia connection,” a source close to Zimmer said.

Another option for Zimmer is as Green Czar in a NJ Governor administration under Phil Murphy. Her staff would go door-to-door seizing inefficient light bulbs decreed morally unsuitable and declare them environmental offenses against the State. Penalties for six or more inefficient light bulbs per household will trigger the seizure of property to house illegal aliens in what will be designated sanctuary safe houses for new voters.


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